Friday, May 14, 2010

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's off to the Mall I Go...

Hi there.

Fibromyalgia can be a real downer but I have discovered a benefit. My wallet has been fuller since I'm no longer a mall rat. Don't misunderstand - I still adore shopping and I really, really hate to say this but... I'm too damn tired to get out of bed. I miss the stores, the browsing, the smell of Visa in the morning.

Today, however, I had the energy to shop til I dropped. I power walked through that mall, I was retail royalty. I considered taking the stairs instead of the esculator. However, I decided that I must pace myself and save energy for my ensuing errands.

I blew through my to-do list like no one's business. Even my debit card was exhausted. I picked up my daughter from school and promptly embodied the 'drop' part of the cliched shopping mantra.

As I laid on the bed, the familiar pain began, sparing no muscle, tendon or joint. My back ached, my legs hurt and my ribs felt bruised. I expected this onslaught of pain after my burst of activity, but all the same, I hoped it wouldn't come calling.

Some days, I take my pain meds and they don't work. When I'm really desperate, I take Lyrica. I don't find that it gives me much relief but it's the strongest analgesic I have in the house at present. I don't do alcohol. The Lyrica swells me up to beluga-size proportions. Plus, it makes me feel very loopy and it still hasn't banished the pain. My gut hurts and it's paired with a hotline of pain down my left leg. I have to wait until Monday to see my doctor and plead for something stronger to kill the pain.

I had planned on a lovely evening walk with my husband and the Diva but I don't have the energy. I know, it's just a walk -there's always tomorrow. However, the reality of fibro is its unpredictability. It's likely that it may strike again and keep me couch-bound. Ya just never know. I haven't learned to accept limitations. I ran errands today which is something I haven't done in weeks, and I want more. I want to feel normal and join the folk strolling along on a warm spring evening. Sigh. Ho hum.

I paid twice today - once for merchandise and again for my activity. With fibro, sometimes you drop before you shop.


  1. Regarding the pros and cons: I too have lost all interest in shopping. It's just not possible or worth it for me to go out because I know I'll pay for it in more than one way. By the time I'm able to shop, I can't imagine what I'd buy because I'm so out of the loop of life that I just can't remember where I left off. This is the first time in my life where I actually have money saved up... I honestly can't decide if that's a good or bad thing.

  2. Before I was diagnosed with Fm 3 years ago, I knew something was seriously wrong when I no longer felt like getting in the car, driving to a mall, to putz around in the shops. It was so unlike me. I was born with a Born to Shop sticker on my butt. I would envision going but even the mere thought had me exhausted. Some mornings I'm too tired to shower, let alone power-walk through a sprawling mall. When I do go shopping these days, it's not like the old days: I have to stop to rest on a bench every so often, like a senior citizen. I'd say it's a good thing that my bank account is fatter (then again, so is my butt due to the lack of exercise.) Maybe I shouldn't put this idea into your head but there is always the world of Internet shopping! Let's don't go there!